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These Hilarious Thanksgiving Jokes Will Make the Entire Table Laugh


There's no reason that Thanksgiving should be stressful! Sure, you probably have lots of things to plan—like that Thanksgiving menu and holiday activity list. (Oh, and those things take time, don't get us wrong!) Though, it's important to remember that this holiday is meant to be a special one cherished with your family and your friends. So, as you're in the process of getting everything ready, it might be worth taking a step back to experience the joy in it all. If you find yourself needing a little help, then why don't you go ahead and read these funny (and corny) Thanksgiving jokes? They'll lighten the mood in no time!

If your family is anywhere as goofy as the Drummonds, cracking a couple of silly Thanksgiving puns will be a welcome addition to your holiday traditions. With dozens of Thanksgiving jokes for kids and adults ahead, you and your loved ones will be gobblin' all night long. After all, laughter is the best medicine—and the gravy on top of a special holiday! With this collection of Thanksgiving humor including turkey puns, food-related one-liners, and pilgrim jokes, you'll be on a casse-roll all evening. These family-friendly Thanksgiving jokes will have every stuffed mouth chucklin'. And who knows—maybe these will give you some inspiration for clever Thanksgiving Instagram captions or fall captions to make your online friends and family laugh out loud, too. What are you waiting for? Go ahead and find out why the turkey crossed the road!

Thanksgiving Food Jokes

turkey jokes

filadendron

  • What do you say to the winner of the corn shucking contest? Corn-gratulations.
  • How many pastry chefs does it take to make a pie? 3.14.
  • Why are Thanksgiving bread jokes always funny? Because they never get mold.
  • What did the mashed potatoes say to the sweet potatoes? I yam what I yam!
  • Why did the cornbread get in trouble? It wouldn't stop loafing around.
  • What do you call a baker who only makes pies? The Pie-oneer Woman.
  • What did one pumpkin pie say to the other? "You wanna piece of me?"
  • Why should you never tell secrets in a cornfield? Because the corn has ears.
  • What did Dad say when he was asked to say grace? "Grace."
  • How'd the Thanksgiving cheese plate go over? Everyone was grateful.
  • What do sweet potatoes wear to bed? Yammies.
  • What did the Thanksgiving turkey say to the Christmas ham? Nice to meat you.
  • Why don’t side dishes tell jokes? They’re too corny.
  • What do you call a sad cranberry? A blueberry.
  • What do you need to make Thanksgiving s'mores? Pil-grahams.
  • Do you know where you can get turkey stock in bulk? The stock market.
  • What do you tell your jokester cousin on Thanksgiving? You’re on a casse-roll!
  • What did the president say when presented with a poorly cooked turkey? “Is it too late for a pardon?”
  • What does grandma say when you burn the holiday meal? Oh, good gravy!
  • How did you find grandma’s turkey this year? I just looked next to the gravy.
  • Why did the cranberries turn red? Because they saw the turkey dressing.
  • What side dish do you bring for Thanksgiving dinner when you accidentally sat on the sweet potatoes? Squash casserole.
  • Why should you never set the turkey next to the dessert? Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
  • What is a turkey's favorite dessert? Peach gobbler!
  • Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive? It had 24 carrots.
  • What role do green beans play in Thanksgiving dinner? The casse-role.
  • How did the salt and pepper welcome all the guests? By saying, "Seasoning's greetings!"
  • What vegetables would you like with your Thanksgiving dinner? Beets me!
  • Why did the policeman stop you on your way home last Thanksgiving? Because you far exceeded your feed limit.

Turkey Thanksgiving Jokes

turkey jokes

Jose Luis Pelaez Inc

  • Did you hear about the turkey prom? It was a Butterball.
  • What do you call a turkey that’s been in the sun for too long? A roasted turkey.
  • What's the best way to keep a turkey in suspense? You'll find out at Thanksgiving dinner!
  • When is turkey soup bad for your health? When you’re the turkey!
  • Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? The outside!
  • What's blue and covered in feathers? A turkey holding its breath.
  • How does a turkey travel? By gravy train.
  • What did the leftover turkey say? "Make me a sandwich!"
  • What’s the difference between a turkey and a chicken? Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving.
  • Fruit comes from a fruit tree, so where does turkey come from? A poul-tree.
  • Why do turkeys hate the kitchen on Thanksgiving? It smells fowl.
  • What do you call gossiping with a turkey at the table? A side dish.
  • Who didn’t have any friends at Friendsgiving? The turkey!
  • What do you get when you cross a turkey with a ghost? A poultrygeist!
  • What does the turkey think about holidays? They’re about family time, after that, it’s all gravy.
  • Why are turkeys good at rebelling? They love a coup.
  • Why did the turkey run across the road? It was time for dinner.
  • What key won't open a door? A turkey!
  • What sound does a limping turkey make? Wobble, wobble!
  • What do turkeys do on Sunday? Have a peck-nics.
  • Why didn't the turkey want dessert? He was stuffed!
  • Why do turkeys hate Thanksgiving tables? They're a fowl sight.
  • What's the best song to play while cooking a turkey? All About That Baste.
  • What do you call a turkey the day after Thanksgiving? Lucky!
  • What sound does a turkey's phone make? Wing wing wing!
  • What was the turkey thankful for on Thanksgiving? Vegetarians.
  • Can a turkey jump higher than a house? Yes, because houses can't jump!
  • Why do turkeys love rainy days? They love fowl weather.
  • Why do turkeys gobble? Because they never learned table manners.
  • What's a popular Thanksgiving dance? The turkey trot.
  • Why do turkeys only star in R-rated movies? Because they use fowl language!
  • When do you serve rubber turkey? Pranksgiving!
  • What do you call a running turkey? Fast food.
  • Why did the turkey play the drums in his band? Because he already had drumsticks!
  • Why did the turkey cross the road? He wanted people to think he was a chicken.
  • What did the turkey say to the computer? Google, google.
  • Who is not hungry at Thanksgiving? The turkey, because he's already stuffed!
  • If you call a large turkey a gobbler, what do you call a small one? A goblet.
  • What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day? Quack, quack!
  • Why was the turkey arrested? The police suspected fowl play.
  • Why shouldn't you sit next to a turkey at dinner? Because he will gobble it up!
  • What type of glass does a turkey drink from? A goblet.
  • What happened to the turkey that got in a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him!

Thanksgiving Puns

turkey jokes

skynesher

  • Y'all bready for this?
  • Say hello to this gourd-geous spread!
  • Family Thanksgiving is totally my jam.
  • A real-life beauty and the feast!
  • You think Thanksgiving dinner is done? You ain't seen stuffing yet.
  • I'm so grateful for my butter-half.
  • You gotta keep track of the thyme on Thanksgiving!
  • And last but not feast…
  • Hand me the gobble-lets so I can pour the wine.
  • More rolls? You butter believe it!
  • My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes, but I said I couldn't quit cold turkey.
  • Let's get basted.
  • I just met you, and this is gravy, but here's my stuffing, so carve me maybe.
  • Stop, drop, and pass the rolls!
  • Oh my gourd, I'm stuffed.
  • I only have pies for you.
  • Will I eat leftovers for a week? I cran, and I will.
  • This stuffing is the tur-key to my heart.

Thanksgiving Knock-Knock Jokes

turkey jokes

Getty Images

  • "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" “Hank.” “Hank who?" “Hanksgiving is here!”
  • "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" “Harry.” “Harry who?" “Harry up it’s time to feast!”
  • "Knock Knock." "Who’s there?" "Dewey." "Dewy who?" "Dewey have to wait long to eat?"
  • "Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Arthur." "Arthur who?" "Arthur any leftovers?"
  • "Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Tamara." "Tamara who?" "Tamara we'll eat all the leftovers!"
  • "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Norma Lee." "Norma Lee who?" "Norma Lee I don't eat this much!"
  • "Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Annie." "Annie who?" "Annie body seen the turkey?"
  • "Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Don." "Don who?" "Don eat all the gravy, I want some more."
  • "Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Olive." "Olive who?" "Olive the turkey stuffing!"

Pilgrim Thanksgiving Jokes

turkey jokes

cstar55

  • What do you call an attractive pilgrim? A puri-ten!
  • What did the Pilgrim wear to dinner? A har-vest.
  • What kind of music did the Pilgrims like? Plymouth Rock.
  • If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims!
  • What kind of tan did pilgrims get at the beach? Puri-tan.
  • What do you call the age of a pilgrim? Pilgrimage.
  • What did pilgrims use to bake cookies? May-flour!
  • Why didn't the pilgrim want to make the bread? It's a crummy job.
  • What's the smallest unit of measurement in the pilgrim cookbook? Pil-gram.
  • What kind of face does a pilgrim make when he's in pain? Pil-grimace.
  • Why do Pilgrims' pants always fall down? Because they wear their buckles on their hats!

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